


Accidentally On Purpose

by Lokei



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: For Science!, Gen, Humor, Imagination, ceremonial headgear, wonder twins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-12
Updated: 2013-10-12
Packaged: 2017-12-29 05:47:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1001725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lokei/pseuds/Lokei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the 2013 SG1 Friendathon</p><p>Daniel and Sam know how to wind Jack up perfectly.  There's no way they're as innocent as they look.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Accidentally On Purpose

Jack watches them sometimes, with their matching twinkles in otherwise oh-so-innocent blue eyes. He’s pretty sure they plan this, that they come up with ways to set his head spinning. He can imagine just how it must have started, in fact…

…  
“You have first watch, Daniel.”

“Mmhmmm.”

“Daniel, eyes up here. You have first watch.”

“I heard you the first time, Jack. I’m awake, I have my book, there is half a day’s walk between us and the nearest intelligent life. Go to sleep.”

Teetering on that line between miffed and amused, Jack hit the tent, nodding to Carter as she went to keep Daniel company for a while.

“So, Daniel.”

“Mmm?”

“Daniel? Daaaaaniel.” (Okay, maybe Carter wouldn’t sound *quite* like that, but this is Jack’s best guess and he is pretty sure that the good Captain unwinds a *lot* when the Colonel isn’t around.)

“Yes, Sam?”

“You got the Colonel good at the briefing this morning. Took him five whole minutes to figure out you were stretching the truth about the ceremonial headgear thing.”

“It would have lasted even longer if you hadn’t started laughing.”

A long pause while they stare at each other with identical slow-growing smiles.

“How long do you think--”

“How good is your--”

“Oh, very good.”

“Oh, yeah.”

\---  
...And that, right there, was the moment that Jack’s pretty sure his doom was decided.

Of course, it could have happened like this, too…

\---  
“Sam, can I get your opinion on this?” Daniel’s hovering in the doorway of her office/lab with those incredibly annoyingly endearing bouncing eyebrows (what, Jack’s sure Carter notices them and is as susceptible as he is…), and Carter looks up with a smile.

"Sure thing, Daniel. How can I help?"

"So these MALP pictures for P68-713 look really promising, but I'm not sure I can get Jack to go for it."  
"It's the general who makes the decisions, Daniel."

"I know that, but you know Jack's recommendation carries a lot of weight with him."

"So what is it you're asking?" Carter holds her hand out for Daniel's printouts.

"What's the likelihood we could make a case for some kind of strategic importance to checking out this planet?" Daniel's face flickers between resigned annoyance and anxious hope (because Jack knows the archaeologist is finally getting the way things work around here, and is somewhat rueful about it).

Carter's frown grows as she looks at the images. "What do you think is the importance?"

Daniel grins at her sheepishly. "Increase of knowledge and satisfying my curiosity? Seriously, though, the structures visible in the distance are a lot like the ones on Chulak. We could be looking at another of Apophis’s slave planets, or one of the Goa’uld who are closely allied with him.”

Carter narrows her eyes. “And you think there might be a clue about Sha’re, too. Well, that’s all solid enough, so why need my help to spell it out?”

“Because it’s only a ‘could.’ There are an awful lot of reasons why this architectural style could exist here, and checking it out *might* have a connection to Apophis, but it’s just as likely--or more likely-- to be something else. And if it is something else, it will fit really well into my study of cultural exchange and population migration through the gate system, which *is* important but a lot harder to spin for immediate military results.”

"Well, I'm happy to help sell the need for reconnaisance, Daniel, but if you're looking for any kind of tactical science backup, I can't do much. The MALP didn't send back any evidence of naquadah or much interesting on my end. And if we push too hard for what's essentially a spying mission, the general could very well choose to send a different team."

Daniel's face screws up in a grimace. "Yeah. I know.”

Carter gives him a reassuring smile. “Hey, this will be fine. It’s not like you’re trying to convince the Colonel that he can’t wear his cap on missions anymore because it too closely resembles some kind of ancient ceremonial headgear.”

Daniel’s eyes light up behind his glasses. “Think he’d fall for it?”

Carter tilts her head and her smile grows by a factor of a scary number of watts. “I’d really like to see you try.” She pauses. “Actually, I’d really like to help.”

Daniel smirks back and adjusts his glasses. “You realize you’re asking me to debase my academic integrity. I lost my grants for less.”

Carter leans back in her chair. “Worth it.”

“....I’m in.”

\---

Mind you, neither of those scenarios include the input of the Big Guy, and Jack is fairly certain that Jaffa humor or no, certain aspects of ‘the straight man’ routine are universal. Teal’c’s poker face is already legendary, but Jack wouldn’t be at all surprised if he had a hand in all this nonsense as well.

It could so easily have gone like this...  
\---

“Daniel Jackson. Captain Carter.”

“Yeah, Teal’c? You have that ‘cultural norms are not interplanetary’ look again. Which, of course they’re not, but--anyway.”

Teal’c’s eyebrow successfully silences Daniel’s pre-lunch rambling. The whole team figured out fast that Daniel without food is way more likely to say what he needs with six times as many words as he does once he’s properly fed. (Jack is pretty sure he’s got a reliable evaluation system down now--percentage of verbiage proportional to number of hours without a meal. He’s looking forward to finding the least convenient and most hilarious time to explain his theory to Daniel as payback for the number of times he’s had to listen to one of Daniel’s cockamamie ideas.)

“What’s on your mind, Teal’c?” Carter comes to the rescue.

“I have observed that in times of difficult decisions, you have successfully used distraction and humor to allow O’Neill the space to consider his options. I would like to offer my assistance.”

Carter turns to Daniel and grins. “It does sometimes seem like you’re doing it on purpose, you know.”

Daniel raises his eyebrows in a passable imitation of their teammate. “What makes you think I don’t?”

Carter considers this for a long moment, looking between them. “I thought you were just, you know, pulling the colonel’s chain. Bucking military authority and all that.”

Daniel tips his head to the side and back but merely smiles wordlessly. “Care to play along?”

“Indeed” overlaps with “hell yes” and Daniel’s smile grows. “I vote we get rid of the stupid helmets. Can anybody think of a better rationale than not wanting to too closely resemble some of our enemies and their penchant for ceremonial headgear?”

“Camo’s not exactly a snake helmet with glowing eyes, Daniel,” Carter hedges, but Teal’c nods.

“An acceptable first mission, Daniel Jackson.I am certain with our assistance that you will prevail.”

\---  
...So yeah, really, any of those scenarios seem equally likely. Jack’s got a few others up his sleeve too, but he looks around the briefing room to see that at the board, the Wonder Twins have turned and are looking at him expectantly.

“Magnets,” he says decisively. “Definitely magnets.”

Daniel shoots Carter a look, lips twitching, and the good captain’s composure flickers for just a moment.

Jack *knew* they were doing it on purpose.


End file.
